Tuesday's the new Monday

Haven't you heard? Tuesday is the new Monday. No, it's true. You see, by Monday you're prepared. You know the week is coming. So what do you do? You set your clothes out the night before, remember to feed the cat, put some bread in the toaster, grab your travel mug and a pear for later, and hey, you even have 10 minutes to spare. One quick dance around the room to your favorite little tune, and you're ready to go.
You pull out of your drive, cringing just a little. However, just as you brace for the worst, you open your squinting eyes just a little, and....nothing. With the pure stretch of road before you, all you can see is the promise of successful day. By now, you're feeling pretty good.
"Take that, Monday," you think triumphantly to yourself. God has smiled on your quest to conquer Monday morning.

Then it happens.
Tuesday.

3: 41 AM- The cat strikes. Perhaps to some it is endearing to have their cat shove it's little head in their face, purring like a disfunctional boat motor. I am not one of these.

3:42 AM- Your brain has somehow interpretted the assault as your alarm. You close your eyes defiantly, but now all you can think of is work, paying rent, that relationship you aren't even sure you're in, how you never realized the air conditioner is so obnoxiously noisy....on and on it goes....

Now let's just skip ahead.

6:10 AM- Yeah, it's time to get up, but who needs a shower right? You're sleep deprived. You can sleep in for ten more minutes.

6:45 AM- It appears ten minutes is a long time. You fly out of bed, and race to the shower, almost taking out the poor cat as you do.

7:00 AM-8:00 AM- Now you can't find a clean towel, then your make-up bag overturns thus inviting Fuzz to run away with the eyeshadow brush, which causes you to realize that you forgot to plug in your curling iron, the dress you wanted to wear accidentally was hung up with the clean clothes, your toaster was never turned on, your shoes somehow were shoved in the dark crevaces beneath the bed, last but not least, that careless move of thowing your keys heaven knows where, has finally come to bite you in the..well...you get the idea.

8:05 AM- So, late to work, dismayed, dejected, carrying limp toast, you sit at your desk in relief and revel at life's absurditites. Then, just for a moment you smile. After all, you still have the rest of day.